ANOTHER MESSAGE FROM GOD!!

First thing is first and that is, you have to read the last post before this one to see the way God is responding to my prayers, questions, and actions.  (Well, you don't HAVE to, you can choose to.)

So, here I am, on this journey to break free from religious bondage and God sends not one, but 2 messages to me within a short period of time. The first is the video I've posted entitled "David." Pastor, Jonathan Wiggins, says things about people worshiping God in truth and Spirit as in, "just being." Not the "faithful church attendance show" that people put on. And the second message is the video of Jefferson Bethke who says it in a slight rap but I couldn't have said it better. 

It's like God is telling people (or at least myself) that the church is failing and we must break free and put it right!! I don't know how God feels about people who go to church every Sunday and demonstrate a kind of faithfulness. I don't know if He counts this to their charge. But I know I can't live inside of that box and still feel like I truly worship and serve Him the way He says to. 

God doesn't judge me. He doesn't tell me He loves me but then leaves me alone to fend for myself through my trials.

I knew I wasn't that far off the track when I broke free from the church. I'm sure that millions of "Christians" would rebuke me and call me "back slider," but I rebuke you and call you "hypocrite."

Too many times have I been told, in the midst of a trial, "Go and be blessed." But that's something the Lord spoke out against. Don't tell your neighbor to go and come later and you'll give. Give at that moment. Don't tell your brother/sister to go away and expect them to be blessed by your telling them to be. We have to be that blessing to them.

I question everything!! The doctrines, the attitudes, the church!! I won't be moved from serving God in truth and in righteousness. I won't become a part of the scenery. I won't conform and be blended so as to become a religious pharisee!!

"Pure religion and undefiled before God and the Father is this, to visit the fatherless and widows in their affliction, and to keep himself unspotted from the world." James 1:27.

SEEK AND YE SHALL FIND

I'm expounding on the last few posts wherein I talk about feeling like religion has been smothering me. I want to go back to the start and regain some awareness of God and less of man and their teachings. I've been so confused and so unhappy with the constant religious environments. Get up on Sunday, go to church, go home, get up on Sunday, go to church, go home. It began to seem like there's something more. I began to question my reasons for attending church. There's value in it but I also have come to realize that it's not how God expects us to love, cherish, honor, or serve Him. My relationship with Jesus Christ is not contingent upon my faithful church attendance and the reason it isn't is because if that was the rule, then people bed-ridden would have no hope of a relationship with Him since they can't leave their beds. So, I've started the process of ridding my life of the religion, ceremony, and tradition that the church has burdened me with. Wear this, talk like that, pray 3 times a day, bow your head, cross your hands, hit your knees, don't make a mistake, don't act human, be a religious femme-bot. No more. So, this morning I stayed home and watched a sermon in Colorado online. I'm posting that sermon here. Here is what God said to me in the midst of my struggle, if you care to know. He's there, He hears, He understands, and if you seek, you WILL find!!

NOTE: This guy is so funny, it's an added bonus to this sermon. He's clearly operating in the Spirit of God and peppers his sermon with funny little commentaries and antics. It makes for an enjoyable experience. I hope you enjoy the sermon as well. He's talking about the 23rd Psalm and King David as it all relates to us. "The Lord is my Shepherd..." Remember you'll need to scroll to the bottom and click "mute" on the playlist.

P.S. I think my fish should be pigs the way they scarf down their little kibbles!!  

HE "RAINS"

God is like the rain that falls on dry and parched desert lands. One minute you can be so dry and in desperate need of refreshing. The next thing you know He's raining down on you. It's life-giving for the soul. I picture my heart to be like a rock sometimes when suddenly, pieces of it begin to crumble away to expose the rhythm of a heartbeat. The life breaks forth. But if we don't stay connected to God and flow through life with Him, that desert land will remain dry and dusty and abandoned. A place where nothing can grow and no one wants to go to. God is the rain that brings the life. The life that sustains is brought by the rains. That which is brought by the rains and sustains the life is needful and can't be forgotten. One can't forget that their life needs to be sustained. He's with me all the time. But sometimes, I don't honor that presence. That's when I begin to become parched. My life begins to resemble a dry lake bed. Cracked, flat, nothing green for miles. But then I realize "with Whom we have to do." And I turn my face to Him, and He sends the life (the rains). And once again..I bloom!!

HE ANSWERED!!

Let me start by saying, I have no idea why my last post and possibly this one have all that space after them. I didn't put that there and I don't like it. It looks like crap. Did you know that you'll get flagged on your local news web page if you use the word "crap" in your comments? ugh. (eyes rolling)

As we know, I've been in a bit of a struggle lately with the church and my attendance and feelings of fear and worry and concern after having left my last church, as I journey through life and figure out where my "place" is.

I was reading Isaiah this morning and God showed me that I'm still ok. I could be better though. As soon as I get back into a good church I think I'll be better.

For now, however, He's speaking to me and encouraging me gently along. In no way am I on the mountain but I'm not in the deepest valley either. Isaiah 34:16 tells me "Seek ye out of the book of the Lord and read: no one of these shall fail....my mouth it hath commanded, and his spirit it hath gathered them." Then over in the 35th chpt and verse 3 He encouraged me in saying, "Strenghthen ye the weak hands, and confirm the feeble knees." vs. 4, "Say to them that are of a fearful heart, Be strong, fear not: behold, your God will come with vengeance, even God with recompense; He will come and save you."

I've also sought word about my living arrangements wherein I've lived in my home for 8 yrs in August and have dealt with A LOT of nonsense from my landlord, including her son tapping into my electricity without asking or ever speaking to me at all. They are currently stealing electricity from me and funneling it into the trailer above me (I live on the mountainside). In Isaiah 36:16, He tells me "eat ye everyone of his vine, and every one of his fig tree, and drink ye every one the waters of his own cistern; until I come and take you away to a land like your own land,..." HALLELUJAH thank you Jesus for that word. Hey people friends! I just found that word as I was typing, but the main thing is that I just asked Him for that word last night!!! I said, "Lord, I can't take much more of this burden and if I don't hear something from you soon, I'm afraid I'm gonna go over the edge and take matters into my own hands and get me out of here!!"

That's not even the scripture I was gonna put there!! I was trying to find somewhere in the 34th or 35th chapters where it said, "I have established you and will keep those who obey my commandments." (paraphrased).

Thank you Jesus for rescuing my broken spirit and giving me a word and encouragement and peace for now!! Glory to God He knows me so well!! I LOVE YOU JESUS!!!

BACK TO THE START

Ok, I wouldn't say life is good but I won't say "kill me now." That's a lie, if I knew that I could commit suicide and God wouldn't mind, I'd be out of here!! I don't say that with sadness and depression..on the contrary...I say that with the complete and utter delight of knowing I will meet my Jesus!! He is everything I look forward to when this journey is over.

Speaking of journeys, I've come to the conclusion that it's time for me to go back to the beginning of my Christian walk and start over without preachers and traditions. I'm going to re-embark on my journey. I'm going to focus my attentions on God's nature and not man's opinions.

It's become quite obvious to me that too many people telling me too many different things about worship and Christianity have muddled the truth for me. I've only become confused and disenchanted. It's time for me to fix this mess.

I give credit to a certain Pentecostal preacher for telling me what it's all about. I was searching and God sent him with the answer. The answer to the question, "how do I live a Christian life?" is "by knowing God through prayer and the yielding of yourself to His marvelous works." This preacher was speaking straight to me in what I perceived to be God's own words. He said, you can't love God by going to seminars and reading 40 chapters of the Bible a day, or dressing a certain way, or attending church regularly.

So, I'm backing up and starting over with a new perspective. I want to serve God in spirit and in truth. I don't want the burdens of religious tradition. If it's "not by might but by my Spirit" then I can't DO anything right.

This is completely off subject but I'm gonna put it out there just in case, I'm finding that ever since downloading the playlist and the little fish tank that my computer is doing weird things like, my mouse isn't responding when I move all the time now, and when I click the enter button on this post the cursor is jumping up to the top of the paragraph and I have to click the mouse to make it move. My computer isn't alerting to any viruses or anything but if there's something downloaded, let this be a warning to anybody else. I'm not too worried yet because I've always had little oddities with blogger posting like having to reset the fonts and colors a lot as I'm typing. I don't know. If you know what it might be, leave a comment please.